My elementary school teacher told us once that Americans only poop once a week. The climate is colder in North America, so their intestines pack the poop together very densely such that they only need to poop once a week. She said you’d be sent to the doctor if you poop daily in America.
Is this true?
Your teacher was either an idiot or fucking with you lol
The climate is colder in North America
Colder than where?
Your elementary school teacher should have been fired.
Common misconception. They only poop when Trump tells them to. If they don’t wait til instructed ICE comes and shoots them.
Land of the free, ladies and gents.
What the fuck am I reading
Lol
On the off chance that this is a real question:
I am an American, and I poop regularly, every day.
I will admit that I do not adhere to the standard American diet, but I know that I am not alone in my poop habits.
I genuinely don’t understand the logic of “America is a colder climate”, because that is ostensibly incorrect.
Is this why so many Europeans treat us like some different species
Having worked in fentanyl crisis towns and then have the neighboring towns proudly proclaim how great America is and how much FREEDOM we have… Totally understandable how Europeans look at us.
Hell, I’ll never forget the look my european coworker gave me when I told them we have a two week parental leave and it’s a fire-at-will state.
Yeah but that’s us being oppressed, I would think it makes sense they find those things abhorrent. But not really the same thing
If an American had thought something as ridiculous as the OP about some other country (and genuinely no offense meant to the OP) they would get destroyed
you seem lost.
this is clearly a [email protected] post
Lol, your teacher sounds amazing.
Oh, she was xD
Nope. I shit every day, in the morning, on a schedule.
Your teacher was full of shit. Sure the Standard American Diet (SAD) is terrible and leaves fiber much to be desired, but not every American sticks to the SAD. I’m sure other countries have people that have shit diets and get constipated too, not just the US.
Generalizations don’t help anyone.
You’re mixing up Americans with sloths, but I guess we’re not that different
Are you still in elementary school? If not, you can’t possibly still believe this
If not, you can’t possibly still believe this
I did until now lol.
I’m busy with other things. I cant give much thought to how many times people in a foreign country poop.
Yet you posted this and didn’t stop to think about it?
No? Why would I? And what conclusion can I come to by thinking? Ive never been to NA anyways. Sometimes its ok to be ignorant of stuff
Ah ok you’re a troll. Got it.
literature.cafe
Checks out lol
Wdym? Isnt this a nice instance?
Is this ragebait?
You are rage baiting 😂
67% come on someone rate this to change the number
done
…it’s still displaying 67%
refresh
O now it’s 71
Thanks bro you’re a bro
What is?
upvote ratio
Ah, is this about that six seven shit?
No.
All this (wonderful) shit-talking and no-one has mentioned painkillers. Earlier this year I spent a couple of weeks in hospital along with a lot of other oldies with fall injuries. We were all taking oxycodone and paracetamol for the pain, and the nurses were obsessed with our bowel movements. We were given laxatives twice a day to hurry things along, and threatened with an enema if we went too long without pooing. After the laxatives worked their magic on me I started refusing to take them, because it took me so long to get across the ward to the toilet I was scared I’d shit myself halfway.
So yes, painkillers are costive.
I had to take oxy’s after hand surgery, and I am not accustomed to painkillers. I ended up constipated, and it was (BY FAR) the worst poop of my life. Like, that (literal) shit hurt worse than the pain of surgery
I’m talking 45+ mins on the toilet; pushing, sweating, almost crying, standing up and down trying to get things to move. I became a little fearful and wondered if I was about to tear my rectum. I felt like I wanted to faint. I couldn’t just stop because it was half-way out, making my bum feel like I was getting spread-open by a dragon or something… and it wouldn’t pinch off. I admittedly dug in my butt, trying to pull it out… I was in fucking shambles and beginning to panic. It felt like I was fighting for my life
It finally cleared, and I was left with pure exhaustion and butt pain. Prune juice helped me to reconcile that issue, and even though I had never tried prune juice — I’m a “forever fan” of that sweet sweet elixir of preemptive relief
I’ll never forget that poop
Thank you for sharing! I realise now what the nurses wanted to spare us…
Cleaning you is waaay easier than disimpaction. If it’s bad enough I have to call someone who doesn’t work holidays, weekends, or any other hour a bank isn’t open. If it’s NOT bad enough to call that person, that’s actually way worse because it’s gonna be you, me, and these phalanges, and neither of us is gonna be having a good time. Now that I work in a tiny community hospital I don’t even have residents I can sucker into it anymore!
“Shhh shhhh shhhhh… you’ll feel better soon, I promise”. And they do! (Then my shift ends, and I think about my life choices)
I was never taught disimpaction in school… but when you know it’s gotta happen, it just is what it is
Bowel movements vary by person. From 3 times a day down to once every 3 days. Less than once every 3 days is considered concerning medically, but not necessarily a problem.
Your teacher was the one full of shit.
Thank you. I feel like addressing the pure science of this is important. Not only do Americans poop, every cultures on the planet poops the same way (more or less). We are the same! Break down borders! Anarchy! Shit everywhere! No. Literally, visit an American truck stop. SHIT EVERYWHERE!
