Don’t try such kind of jokes with security in the airport or with the police.
My dad once joked about having a bomb while going through airport security.
It was 1997, though.
I still nearly came unglued at him.
Security just rolled their eyes. And I’m pretty sure it was just basically like the call of the void. It was obviously a joke too
both my wife and I have to stop ourselves from making those jokes. she swears she doesn’t have a dark sense of humor, but she works at a school. she’s had so many damn drills and we’ve had to seriously comprehend so many different horrific scenarios1 she sometime tells school shooting jokes to lighten the mood.
1 that is supposed to be higher or lower dammit fuck you formatting short version of the training we've both had that is accessible to almost everyone
If you’re wondering what’s the least you can do to get prepared, CPR and Stop the Bleed training are first aid training that are accessible, beginner level training that people of nearly every ability level can do. I am nearly bedridden and I get CPR and Stop the Bleed certified every other year (I tag along with my wife’s CPE. The district has gotten used to me showing up, I pay for my own cert, and we went to high school with the EMTs who teach the class (technically I taught one of them his first first aid class in boy scouts but meh. he’s passed his boards fair and square it’s just funny how small a world it is sometimes because we just keep reviewing the same shit every two years like we’re going to a bad church)
edit: mild formatting, sent for coffee
Jeez. Even when I was a child in the 1980s I clearly remember that is one of the words we absolutely must never say at an airport. Your dad is somethin’ speshul.
Sure, just hide the fact that you are funding ISIS and the Taliban, the banker is on your side!
JK folk.
Your bank invests your money in selling arms to other countries all the time. They’re already complicit in all manner of things. They just don’t want it spelt out.
Have my friends make the note on all cashapp transactions to me say “Support for ICE” so the powers that be double what I receive. 😌
“Sam of Team Starling” sounds less like someone who works for a bank and more like a DC Comics sidekick 😄
OO EE CHIIIRR OOO - says the starling
Yeah. I’m sure that’s what actual bad guys do. They label their crimes and plots clearly with bank transactions.
What a bunch of fucking idiots.
Have you read the emails in the Epstein files? The ones where they’re openly talking, in plain text, over Gmail, about trafficking girls and women?
Yes, actual bad guys do incredibly stupid things when they think the law can’t touch them.
They absolutely fuckin’ do. It is stunning how stupid some people are, especially when committing a crime, especially online.
But imagine the outrage if a terrorist group actually marked their payments like this – maybe the day before their suicide attack – with the thought that what does it matter anyway they won’t be here to be investigated.
And the bank didn’t investigate. The bank would be fined to hell and back and lose all trust, because they couldn’t do “the bare minimum” in finding something this obvious.
Tons of other topics. Try ‘political bribe’ or ‘lobbying fund’ next time. I’m sure that should be hand waved through.
I know Paypal once blocked some stuff because some abbreviation or meme got flagged due to a sanctioned company having the same initials, but I can’t remember ehat exactly it was… went through some news.
I am glad someone reads those. When I was 15 and got my bank account, while making cash deposits I used to put “I use Arch-based distro, btw” into the “note” field.
It was Manjaro with Plasma. Now I use vanilla Arch.Switch to tagging transactions as ‘real estate fraud’, ‘financial instrument fraud’, ‘fake university’, ‘epstein party fund’
We don’t prosecute these things.
Does not sound like they appreciate it
I used to put thing like crack, heroin, coke & hoes; I wish I got an email like that from the bank.
I guarantee every single one of those transactions got flagged and a report was written as per federal banking regulations. If they didn’t the bank could face heavy fines for failing to monitor for illegal financial transactions. Do most of those reports amount to nothing? Absolutely but the reports get filed and the paper trail exists
Fun fact: back in the early 2010’s Verizon Wireless started a new mobile payment option where you had the option to get an accompanying debit card for your account with the name of the app on it.
The mobile payment system name was ISIS.
Isis was a major Egyptian goddess. It shouldn’t be super surprising that things had that name before the Islamic State co-opted it.
Bob Dylan has a (great) song called “Isis”
When I was younger I always called my multiplayer guilds and factions Eye of Isis / Isis Eye. I am afraid doing that now would me considered “political” :(
one of my friends had a dog named Isis around that time. also the fictional spy agency from the tv show Archer was called ISIS, which was written out of the show at the start of the fifth season, earlier ones have them running around saying “we’re ISIS agents” all the time. it was a totally normal thing until it suddenly wasn’t
Back in the day, Avid (the company that makes professional software like media composer and pro tools) sold a NAS system called ISIS (Infinitely Scalable Intelligent Storage). The studio I worked at had a different system, but the head of post production still called it “the ISIS” because he got used to calling the network storage that.
Was the system good or had it other false promises? Infinitely sounds very unprofessional for me.
What happens when we used all the resources on our planet to scale the NAS? Did they have the technology back than, to harvest other planets or even other star systems? So many questions…
😉
lol, why would two people downvote this perfectly relevant link?
This website leans anti-Amazon. You shouldn’t be surprised to catch a couple downvotes when posting a link to an Amazon website.
Feels.
If you keep sending them the bank may give you the boot. They tend to fire customers who trigger too many investigations of this type.
Along with seizing all your funds until they’ve “investigated.” Its not like this is on the banks, the government forces them to do this in the name of “stopping terrorism.”
AML is fun because it gets triggered when you least expect it and then you can’t make any payments from your account till you explain to someone on the phone how you got your money because the automated system (or human reviewer? idk) didn’t detect it as legitimate because of a random technicality
Luckily, I only have debt on my account.
For real though, the only way to deal with pervasive surveillance is to give them too much noise to surveil.
Before we had EU-wide free instant money transfers that only worked within some banks. Two guys, who were at one such bank, decided to use it as an instant messenger. So they sent hundreds of messages while transferring just one Cent back and forth.
Until they got a message from a bank teller that they were equally amused by their jokes but should tone down the frequency because every money transfer cost the bank 11 Cents (don’t remember the real number, but it was ridiculously high).
Assuming they sent 1000 texts a day that would cost the bank a whopping $100. I think they’ll be fine.
