May I present the English to LinkedIn translator.

It’s just trying desperately to land a job I’m not judging. Good luck beaver, hope you ace that interview.

except where they are introduced that they are non native. Europe has thier own species of beaver genetically unrelated to the north american one apparently.

I want to say that everyone hates that kind of purple job prose, but I suspect there’s some small minority of people who actually think and talk like that.

I kind of want to build a LinkedIn but you’re only allowed to talk like a real person. If you post slop or whatever that kind of shit is, you’re banned and we all pledge not to work with you.

There’s a similar effect affecting job descriptions on Indeed. Ugh.

Beavers in captivity will dam over a speaking which makes the sound of running water, which researches then tested extensively to prove Beavers’ instinct to dam is triggered by the urge to make the sound of running water stop.

I like to imagine the beaver’s ancestor was a really big neuroatypical rat who one day was like "I hate this sound and will throw sticks at it until it stops.

Honestly, this one isn’t much of an exaggeration.